Today on pop music I found out we were going to perform on the school ball: hooray :) just one problem: I don't have a proper dress! I asked my mum about it, and guess what. She won't buy me one. She said I already have one. Wtf? My black dress is pretty... but I'd rather not wear it on other occasions than boring violin concerts and funerals... CERTAINLY NOT on a ball... eventually she let me look in second hand shops. And I will, but for another reason. I decided to sew my creation. I will need loads of black and red material, mostly satin (or fake) and LACE LACE LACE. I've been having some wet dreams about the corsets in the near underware shop, and I'm destinied to buy one... or, if its not good enough ill just order one from papercats. Ill be a Goth queen in the sea of pink cocktail dresses }:D

Ofcourse, ill be needing money for that too...  that will be hard, since I'm in a family that will pay for my lessons, not for things I like. They think that everything that doesn't involve learning is stupid, worthless, and time wasting. I'm stupid and ignorant because I do things I enjoy instead of learning all day. I'm dumb because I want to be a singer, and have my own style. I'm stupid because I have interests, they never had. My dad liked maths, my mum liked writing, I like sewing, drawing, singing, creating, painting, writing, makeup, and tons of other things. They never did. And they want me to be who they are. But they're unhappy, and have lots of problems, and keep screwing their life up. And mine too. I'm prepared to have problems, but I'm not going to be the way they are, because hell, I want to have a happy life, doing what I love.